The Meeting

The day started like any other day, but I had butterflies in my tummy fluttering like nothing before. I thought maybe I was still full from the delicious and wonderful Thanksgiving meal my mom had prepared the evening before. But I knew these butterflies weren't fullness, but nerves. I was to meet a woman that carried me for nine months. A woman that knew my history before my birth. A woman that made the most heart wrenching decision a woman can make. I was to meet my birthmom.

We readied ourselves in the late morning to set out on our hour long drive to a destination that would change all of our lives. My nerves were getting worse as time grew nearer and decided to take a Xanax to take the edge off of me. I know that's terrible, but hey, everybody needs a little help now and then.

My hubby and I decided before we left that we wanted to stop at this little shop and get 2 dozen long stem red roses. I didn't want my mom to see and kept her occupied while hubby bought the flowers. We drove in separate cars because hubby, our son and I would be remaining at our destination for the weekend and my mom was going to go back home that evening.

We arrived and I just kind of sat in the car because a wave of fear came over me. Although I had spoken with my birthmom for over a month, I still feared the unknown. My mom reassured me that everything will be fine and that she'll be there for me. I can't tell you how much that meant to me. Thank God for my mom. She's always been there for me and probably always will be. I'm priviledged to have her in my life and to be able to call her "mom" and "friend".

I finally got my composure together and we started up the walkway to a home that belonged to my birthmom and hubby's friend. They were kind in allowing this to happen in their home. The door opened and we were escorted into the living room. There I saw what was like a mirror image of me. Same hair and smile. We hugged and told each other that it had been a "long" time. I was surprised that neither of us had broken down. Actually, now I look back and realize that both of us are really strong in the way we handle situations. I introduced her to my mom and they hugged and got teary eyed.

My brother "L" was there to greet me along with my sister "C" from Texas. This was our first meeting for us. Around the corner comes another guy handing me flowers. Come to find out that it was my brother "D" from Oregon who told me that he couldn't make it, but decided to surprise me instead. I have to say that the memory of my day has been etched in my mind forever.

Once things kind of settled down I had my hubby go to the car and get the flowers. I wanted to give the mothers something to remember for the rest of their lives. I know the reunion was probably enough, but wanted them to have something that they could press in a book or something (which both of them did). I presented each mother with the long stem roses explaining that each will have a special place in my heart. I have to say it was a special touch to the day.

My mom brought photo albums for my birthmom and siblings to see me growing up. My birthmom gave me several photos of all the aunts and uncles. I looked at them and again, saw me in acouple of them. It was truly remarkable. We sat and looked through them for hours laughing, talking and enjoyed a wonderful dinner prepared by the owners of the home who out of the kindness of their hearts opened their home to all of us. It was like we all knew each other for years.

As the sun was about to set my mom decided it was time for her to travel back home. I can't explain it, but although I felt comfortable with everyone, my mom was like my "saving grace" and I really didn't want her to leave, but she felt that I really needed "alone" time with them. I respected her wishes and walked her out to her car. As we were talking she said that she had "met them somewhere before". She just couldn't put her finger on it. She gave me a hug and said that they were "wonderful" and that I should enjoy myself. I gave her a hug and then watched her drive away. The butterflies were back but not as bad.

We sat and talked for a little while more and my hubby decided to go get our room at the hotel. My birthmom and her hubby were tired with all the excitement and us "kids" were "amped to the gill" wanting to know everything about one another. So, we decided to take the younger kids roller skating to give us bigger "kids" a chance to get to know each other. We talked, laughed and joked around for hours. Finally it was time for us to part for the evening and say goodnight.

We went back to our hotel room and I was looking at the picutres that "J" my birthmom had given me of the aunts and uncles. There were 13 aunts and uncles (not including "J") all together. 3 of them were deceased already (1 died in Vietnam, 1 died of brain cancer, and 1 died due to injuries after a fight). I kept looking at "J"s sister "N" the one I thought was my birthmom. There was something about her. I pulled a picture of me when I was her age in the picture and it was like twins. My hubby took a look and was completely astonished.

The next day we went back to the home of their friends and all of us were preparing breakfast when "J" and her hubby said something that just completely astonished me. They both said "we've met your mom somewhere, but can't put our finger on it". I was floored. I told them that my mom had said the same thing the previous evening before departing for home. Anyway, we spent the whole weekend getting to know one another. When we were ready to leave we hugged and promised that we'd call, e-mail and see each other when we could. I mean gosh, I had 3 more siblings and lots of aunts and uncles to meet..... And the journey continues